Everything in Between (A McRoll in the REAL World Story)
by ilna
Summary: Cody tells Steve about the day that changed his life.


**Notes:** Thanks to Mari and Sammy for everything as always.

Readers and REAL McRollers - Thank you for your support!

 **Apologies for the later posting - hope you enjoy!**

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 _Everything in Between (A McRoll in the REAL World Story)_

"So what's going on at school?" Steve asked as he and Cody finished their weekly lunch. "Classes are good?"

"Yeah, they're good," Cody replied. "I've got midterms next week."

"Wow, already? This month has really flown by. It's hard to believe February's over."

"Yeah. It's been a busy month. So busy I didn't even think about …" His voice trailed off.

"Think about what?" Steve prompted, pushing his plate out of the way.

Cody paused, but only for a moment. "Last week, the 20th? That used to be a date that I …" He exhaled and started again. "That was the day Mom told my– told _him_ to leave and not come back."

Steve nodded, understanding. "Jason."

"Yeah. Mom worked at Dr. Davenport's office during the week, but she also had this weekend job at a store so he was supposed to stay home with us because he was wasn't working." He rolled his eyes, his anger clear. "That happened a lot. Mom would find a second job when he got fired or laid off or whatever instead of him going to find another job." He shook his head. "Anyway, usually he just watched TV or slept … but this time … he said he had something he had to do and that he'd be back in an hour."

Steve stiffened and his jaw tensed.

"Sometimes he'd do that when Jacob was napping," Cody continued. "He'd always be back before my mom got home and he'd tell us not to say anything to her." Cody shook his head, still frustrated with himself even years later. "I don't know why I didn't. I guess I just didn't want to give my mom something else to worry about."

"I get that, and that's commendable, but it was also really dangerous, Cody," Steve said, his tone gentle but firm.

"I know. It didn't happen a lot but …"

"Even once was unacceptable."

Cody nodded. "I know," he said again. "We're lucky something bad didn't happen. I wish I had told Mom the first time he did it but … " He sighed, looking down.

"You should have, that's true, but it was Jason who was at fault. Not you. What he did was beyond irresponsible and reckless," Steve said, his own anger boiling over. "He put you all in danger."

"That's what Mom said, too."

Steve took a breath, calming down and asked, "What happened that day?"

"Mom came home early. Her boss had sent her home because she wasn't feeling well. When she got there and realized he'd left us alone …" His face clouded over as he remembered her reaction. "I've never seen her so angry. But then she got really quiet. She told me to take all the kids into the backyard to play and to not come back in until she came out to get us. I didn't know what was going on and … honestly, I was kind of scared because I'd never seen her act like that." He paused. "I think she could tell because she took a couple deep breaths and she hugged me and told me everything was going to be okay, but she needed me to do that for her. I still didn't get what was going on, but I got Jake up and got some snacks and took everybody out back. Casey and Dylan were already out there anyway so they didn't think anything was going on. And we stayed outside for a long time."

"And that's when your mom told Jason to leave for good?"

"Yeah. I saw through the window when he got home. I could kind of hear them if I stood right by the backdoor, but I didn't want the others to hear, so if they came over to me I'd go into the yard and play with them for a bit and then go back and listen." He looked down, tapping a finger lightly on the table. "I didn't hear everything, but I heard enough." He looked back up at Steve. "He tried to say he'd only gone up the street for a couple minutes to get some cigarettes and it was just a one time thing but she didn't believe him." His face darkened again. "He actually asked what I'd been telling her, said whatever it was I was lying. That's when she got really mad. She said I wasn't even twelve yet but I was already more mature than he'd ever be."

Steve remained quiet, marshaling his own anger.

"I didn't hear what she said next because Kaitlyn spilled her juice box but when I came back to the door, Mom was telling him she was finally done believing he'd ever be anything but selfish and immature. She said she never thought before that he'd actually put us in danger. He said nothing happened but she said she wasn't going to wait until something actually did. She said that he wasn't ever going to be a real father or husband and that she wanted him to go and not come back."

"What did he do?"

Cody's jaw clenched and his voice was tight when he answered. "He just laughed and said he'd be back in a week when she 'cooled off.' " He shook his head. "But I knew it was different this time. And it was. Mom went to a lawyer and she got the locks changed and … and that was the last day he ever lived with us." He looked at Steve. "I've never … really told anybody all that before."

"I'm glad you did." Steve nodded slowly. "And I can see why you remember that date."

Cody looked down, exhaling heavily. "I should have been in there with her. Standing up to him. She shouldn't have had to do that alone."

"Cody, you weren't even twelve years old yet."

"But I–"

"You did what you needed to do that day. You watched your brothers and sisters while your mom did what _she_ needed to do."

"I know, but … I still wish I had gone inside. I wish I had told him …"

Steve leaned forward, regarding him steadily. "You said what you needed to say to Jason. I was there."

Cody looked at him, searching his face and finding nothing but honesty and understanding there. "You're right. I did."

"And you did it when you were really ready. When it would have more impact." He grimaced. "Well, as much impact as anything could have on someone like Jason."

Cody nodded. "I didn't like thinking about him … ever, really, but every year when that date came around, it was like this weird anniversary because it was the day everything in our lives changed, and it was good that he was gone but it made me think about things I wished I had done different, you know?" He sighed, shaking his head. "I don't know, I guess it's complicated."

Steve sat back, staring at him quietly for a moment. "Yeah, I know about complicated," he said finally.

Cody watched him, waiting.

Steve took a deep breath and continued. "September 3rd. That was the day my dad told me he was sending me and Mary away. In the years after that, I went out of my way to avoid remembering that specific date because of how it made me feel. Angry at him. Angry at myself."

"At yourself?"

Steve paused. "I used to think if I had said the right things that day, I could've convinced him to change his mind. Or I could have somehow refused to go. But …" He swallowed thickly. "But his mind was made up." He paused again. "So I avoided talking about it. Tried not to think about it." He shook his head. "That didn't always work so well."

"Yeah, I know what you mean."

"Now, I'm not saying our situations are the same, they're not. I don't agree with what my father did, but I do know he was doing what he thought he had to to protect me and Mary. But Jason …"

"He never acted like a father."

Steve nodded, exhaling. "So I'm not equating the two, I just … I want to tell you that eventually I realized that the anniversary of that date came and went without me noticing. Not that I ever forgot it happened, but I had a life that I was living. A life I enjoyed and a life that _I_ had made. And while it was true that my dad's decision that day changed my life, I had made plenty of decisions since that day to get me to where I was. To where I am now." He looked at Cody. "Does that make sense?"

Cody nodded slowly. "I think so."

"So the fact that you didn't remember the 20th last week like you used to, I think that says a lot about how far you've come, and how happy you are with your life right now. The life _you_ and your family have made."

A small smile appeared on Cody's face. "I think you're right." He paused for a moment, thinking. "Telling you what happened, you know what it made me realize?"

"What?"

"That what I should think about when I think about that day is how proud I am of my mom."

Steve smiled. "I agree."

"I know it took a lot of … a lot of strength to tell him everything she did. To tell him to leave and not come back. And to make sure he didn't."

"Your mom is an amazing person."

"She is. And when I get home, I'm gonna tell her that. And I'm going to tell her that I'm done thinking about that day as anything other than the day our lives changed for the best."

"Good for you."

Cody looked at the remains of their lunch and huffed a little laugh. "Man, I didn't think that's what we'd be talking about at lunch today."

Steve smiled softly. "Me, either, but I'm glad we did."

"Me, too." He returned Steve's smile. "Thanks."

"I'm always here to listen, Cody," Steve said, holding his gaze. "Remember that. To the good, the bad, and everything in between."

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